I've always been naturally thin. As a kid, I heard lots of negative comments about my weight. Follow me on Instagram @ValpoMedia
"Skinny Girls Have No Right to Complain"
I have been thinking about writing this article for years, but there have been a number of things holding me back. I'd felt like being naturally thin was a curse, but I never had an outlet to express how I felt. I'd get picked on at school for a number of reasons, especially for liking science, which was not "right" for a girl and for being so thin.
The biggest hurdle in writing this is that I've always been told that I should feel lucky that I'm this thin. So, what right do I have to complain?
I did also hear, "you're lucky." But I'd also hear nasty comments. I had a friend in high school who was heavier, and she would always complain about how large she was and how no guy would ever love her. I always thought she was so pretty and envied her beautiful, blonde hair. However, one day I overheard her saying something to the effect of, "Well you know, skinny girls are all b*tches!" She wasn't talking about me, but the comment still made me feel bad.
I never felt like I was allowed to be upset about being disliked for my weight. I was "lucky," whatever that meant. I never really cared about how I looked. I just felt like I had a normal body. Not that I'm drop dead gorgeous (wouldn't that be nice), but I just worried about other things like homework.
My Design Specifications
I am somewhere around 5 feet, 4 inches, and weigh somewhere between 100 pounds and 110. For those of you who are whipping out your BMI calculators, my body mass index is a little under 18.
Apparently, it's genetic. My mom was unusually thin as a child and would get picked on... and her mother... and her mother. There's this story about when she toured a bread factory on a field trip and they gave each child a slice of bread. One of the employees looked at my mom with pity/concern on her face and said, "You can have two."
Getting Picked On In School
It started in 4th grade when I wanted to play soccer with other kids on the playground. I was disallowed because I was too little. At this point, there was no real bullying, just little comments here and there. I was really into dinosaurs, anyway, so I pretended to be on geology and explorer adventures during recess!
I weighed 45 pounds in the 5th grade and as some of the other kids started getting their growth spurts, my small size attracted more attention. I remember a girl on the playground asking me my weight. She said, "that's how much a kindergartener weighs; you should be dead." The comments increased and there was more exclusion, but at this point, I was still a fairly happy kid.
6th grade is when things took a turn for the worse. My playground fossil explorer games weren't popular with other kids anymore. Boyfriends, perfume, and dark lipstick were super popular and some kids were even having sex at this point. The comments went from mean to cruel and I became really introverted almost overnight. When I came home from school, I would hide in my closet, crying until dinner. One day, I was picking through some pebbles in the same (my dad had shown me how to find fossils in the playground pebbles) and a kid playing basketball shouted to me that I was weird. I shot back, "Yeah, well you suck at basketball." The argument went back and forth and was likely hurtful to both parties, but otherwise harmless until our substitute that day, who'd been watching over us at recess, stepped in and said, "If she's annoying you, you can go at her, if you want." The substitute lost his job over this statement, which at the time I was happy for, but now I feel bad for. He was a college student, just a dumb kid. All the children in the playground, except for some girls on the swings who were acquaintances of mine beat me up. That's about 40 kids. Kicking me in the sand, pulling my hair, throwing sand in my face, until the substitute broke it up. The school district was really proactive over, they took it very seriously, but I couldn't face those kids anymore, so my parents sent me to private school for a few years.
After going to private school, I was pretty confident. I'd made friends and gotten involved in after school activities, learned to use (and love) computers, but private school was very expensive so I returned to public school in the middle of high school. I was terrified to face those kids again, but they were actually really nice by that time -- perhaps their hormones had leveled and, let's face it, everyone is immature in 6th grade.
In high school, most of the weight thing actually came from the guidance counselor. Like I said, the school system was really proactive about things and perhaps, the guidance counselor even saw things that weren't there. She'd set up meetings with me and drop hints about anorexia. At first, I understood her concern but assured her I was fine. In fact, I really didn't care -- other than the weight comments. However, with continued pestering, I started to feel really self-conscious about my weight. I denied being anorexic, but she said that denial is common among those suffering from anorexia. This just seemed to confirm her belief. So anytime I'd deny having anorexia, it was my "anorexia" talking. This is kind of funny, in hindsight, but frustrating then.
The worst of it came during my senior year of high school. I was called out of class by the guidance counselor. She took me to the lunchroom and got me a yogurt and sat with me making sure I ate the whole thing. The next day at school an acquaintance came up to me and said, "I heard you're anorexic. If you need anyone to talk to, just know I'm there for you." I was crushed.
At this point, I quit high school with three months remaining. The principal understood my situation and allowed me to finish my coursework at home so that I could still graduate on. The guidance counselor did not return the following fall.
Things That Suck About Being Thin
There are a lot of weight loss regimes out there. I see a lot of body shaming of heavier women and I suppose if I were a heavier, I would probably buy into it. I bought into being a "problem" for being too thin. I think everyone would like to have a skinny waist, but trust me, you don't want this!
- Pant size comes up casually in conversation a LOT! Here's how it happens. "You are so thin! What size pants are those? I bet you're like a 0."
- They don't stock my size in stores. Stores want to cater to sizes that people actually buy! Not even online stores stock my size! There have been so many times I've come across a really cool political tee with a great message on it, but the smallest size is small or medium. I swim in a small.
- No breasts. Not a huge problem, because I was never particularly concerned about breast size.
I still get called anorexic. It baffles me, I love to eat and I can put away a lot of food! People joke about how I eat salad. They call it "the soup AND salad" given the amount of salad dressing I use, and that's after I've loaded it with chicken breast and eggs. Even co-workers joke about the fact that I would down a huge lunch in seconds like I'm some sort of voracious animal. While I eat a hefty portion of food, I just don't put on weight.
How Being Underweight Can Be Worse Than Being Overweight
There are more and more people who are finding their weight isn't "ideal" because they wear something larger than a size 8. Perhaps this is due to busy schedules not allowing Americans free time to go outside and exercise and to the junk that is pumped into food. As more and more people are finding themselves overweight, everyone hears more about it.
There are literally hundreds of fad diets out there -- they all promise to be "the best way" or "the healthiest way" or allow you to "eat what you want." The word "diet" constantly being thrown in a larger person's face can make them feel like garbage.
With all these constant reminders, it's pretty much been stamped into etiquette that you don't call a person "fat" and you don't talk with the person about losing weight. It's seriously just not nice to make comments on how overweight a person is. It's hurtful!
When it comes to being underweight, society throws all that etiquette out the window. It seriously does not exist! If you're a larger person, you've heard comments about your weight. It makes you feel like trash! Imagine getting those comments all the time!
Coping With Low Self-Esteem
It's been several years since high school, but I still get a lot of comments about my weight from people. People still point out to me that anorexic people deny having an eating disorder. It makes me angry when people say things like that to me. Of course, I never show it. I've become fantastic at pretending things are okay until I get quiet time alone.
There are things I have to watch out for, of course, with being skinny. I have to make sure that I get enough to eat even when I'm stressed --and I have to watch my weight to stay in a healthy zone.
I know I don't have an eating disorder. I just need to work on no longer making excuses for being who I am. I wish people wouldn't assume it's an eating disorder. I'm naturally thin. I'm just skinny, not anorexic.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and does not substitute for diagnosis, prognosis, treatment, prescription, and/or dietary advice from a licensed health professional. Drugs, supplements, and natural remedies may have dangerous side effects. If pregnant or nursing, consult with a qualified provider on an individual basis. Seek immediate help if you are experiencing a medical emergency.
Bri on June 13, 2017:
This article has helped me a lot to be honest. I am 15 years old and weigh about 97 pounds. People talk about me in school all the time. Theres constant rumours that im anorexic and im not, nor have I ever had an eating disorder. It makes me so upset and frustrated because I am eating large amounts of food all the time! I love food and I love to eat! But when I tell people this and that I am just naturally skinny they say "She's just covering up her disorder" And It makes me struggle with my depression even more and struggle with liking my body more than I already do. Loving my appearance has become extremely hard because of this.
Tancia on February 12, 2017:
Thank you for sharing your experience, at least I know someone has the same encounters like myself. I'm skinny, 5ft 6inch at 103 pounds. I eat a lot but I've never seem to gain weight. In high school people use to comment on how skinny I was, they tried to measure my waist with two hands or my hands with one hand which was really annoying. Now that I'm 19 years old, I've gain some confidence over the years so when someone will say "you're so skinny, can't you eat?" I'll retort and let them know that I'm not starving and most people are trying to have a toned stomach or small waist like mines with all these 'body shaping products on the market.' On several occassions people told me that if I get pregnant I will die because of my body structure. What I realised is that people who usually complains about my body, is not comfortable with themselves so they pick on others. Just love yourself, wear clothes that suits your body type. Self love and acceptance is the best thing to do, afterall there are many perks for being skinny. Eating food and gaining no weight is a superpower that most people want to have.
Taz on January 28, 2017:
Thank you for this, you probably have a slight idea of how "naturally" skinny girls out there reading this feels like. I like to play all types of games especially basketball and field hockey and the most horrible feeling ever is people undermining my ability to play due to my size; which is absolutely offensive, and like you I've learned to mask my emotions.
Amanda on October 11, 2015:
Finally someone posts something about people bullying skinny people! I've always been pretty thin and have been teased more for my flat chest rather than my figure. Plus, my thinness never helped my best friend. I felt like a reminder of her "fatness" since she had anorexia. She'd always talk to other people about my skinniness in a way that sounded insulting like it was my fault for being this way. To all girls out there, skinny or bigger, you are all beautiful the way you are! And when people tease you, it's because they don't accept themselves. Don't ever change who you are and be respectful of others. ❤️
Angel D'Angelo from Tampa, FL on February 14, 2015:
Melanie, thank you for this article! As a male, being skinny has been a constant topic. It was used as a way to bully me because I appeared vulnerable or to discuss my lack of masculinity.
My least favorite comments include the anorexia comments but also, "If I was as thin as you, I'd have a date tonight!" Oh, that makes those of us who are thin or have relationship problems feel so fantastic.
I agree that fat shaming is a large problem but it shouldn't be counteracted with comments on our weight class.
And I'm tired of people watching me eat or commenting on my eating habits!
Flora on January 08, 2015:
Thanks for your hub it relates to a lot of us skinny girls. I was and am still the same growing up right now, everyone makes fun of me and my size. I also have a friend who always looks at herself as obese an it tell her about how I hate being this skinny but she always says she rather be skinny then fat. I am almost certain this isn't true cause no one ever picks on her she just lowers her own self esteem whereas I have had to go through years of getting bullied and teased for my weight. Lets hope I soon see the light at the top of the hill! Thank You
ashley havens on August 22, 2014:
I too have have been constantly bullies about my weight. I can honestly relate with you. I have 3 boys and lost all my weight in no time. People say I'm so skinny like its gross to them and say I'm going to blow off when its windy. Has me even thinking I'm gross looking which has caused some real psychological problems such as panic attacks, depression, ugly, anti social. It really does affect me like it would saying anything to anyone about how they look. I hope more people realize that.
Nikole on August 07, 2014:
Vanessa on July 19, 2014:
Recently i was at a business conference with a very petite colleague of mine whom had a baby. Another lady joined us and told my colleague she could not imagine her pregnant and did she have any photos of herself pregnant. My colleague looked horrified at this and gave a no. To me it was almost like this lady was questioning how my colleague because she was small could be a woman like her. It was quiet mean i thought. No doubt if she had photos she would have been bullied about how big or small she was.
Kathleen Odenthal from Bridgewater on July 03, 2014:
This is an excellent article and a story that must be told. I myself am a sufferer, or survivor rather of anorexia, but my best friend was always very tall and lean, and people would make comments to us and I know how they both affected us deeply, in different ways. So much focus is placed on losing weight in today's society that people who are thin are automatically judged in one way or another. Great hub, shared and voted up, interesting and useful!
Anna on May 09, 2014:
I really can't thank u enough for this story. I'm just the same and I hate how wherever I meet someone new they luk at me and go wow ur so thin do u eat? I EAT LIKE AN ELEPHANT and don't gain weight is that my fault? They make me feel like that's a bad thing that I can eat without worrying about getting fat. What's weird is that everyone finds it wrong to call a girl obese but then isn't it just the same calling a girl anorexic? It hurts so bad no one can imagine it. Makes u think whether ur worth it or not :/ thank u again
skye2day from Rocky Mountains on April 13, 2014:
melbel, I came over months ago to read your hub. I am back as I saw it posted in the feeds. I admire your honesty. I hope after writing this it gave you the freedom you need to move on and put it behind you.
I understand because I am very thin I am over 60 years old. Growing up I was thin and most girls were envious. My weight was thin on the line of too thin, but now I am very thin. I have lost more weight since I turned 55 I range from 95 to 105 lbs at 5'5' My first and foremost comment is, 'are you ok, you look so thin.' the comment coming in second is, 'do not loose anymore weight.' Third comment, 'are you eating?
I think the biggest concern I have is feeling like I have to defend my self and answer their question. I do not think these people ask fat people questions? I have had suggestions that I may have tapeworm. I do have a respiratory illness that does have some relation to why I am thinner. Most people that have the illness are larger because they do not get enough exercise because of fatigue.
I am grateful you shared a message here. I see there have been many readers. Amen girl. Just to think you have helped many by sharing your story. You have opened the door for many to see how they have possibly harmed another with words. Words are everything they can make or break a person. We can never take them back!!!
Melbel, God is using your story to touch so many hearts!!! He is the healer. I have asked Him to put weight on me. I am working at it as well by trying to shove in more calories. Some are so envious because I can eat what I want and when and where I want. Yet they look at something and gain 5 lbs. So there is a bit of good news in being so thin. We do have the luxury of eating whatever. I have managed to put on 7 lbs and hold it there. It is allot of work to be eating all the time. Sometimes I am not hungry but working to add more calories to the flesh. I am sure you have done the same things.
God created you melbel. He loves you just as you are. People can not help themselves. We are born with wicked hearts. God is the heart changer. We do not need to teach people how to be mean or evil. We all know how to do that. Put two three year old in a room together with one toy! We can pray for those that hurt us. It is for our benefit not to hang on to bitterness or unforgiveness. Not implying you do not forgive those that may have harmed you. Just know they do not know better and are ignorant and if they intentionally hurt you they are wicked. Pray for them. You will see you have compassion for them. Maybe they are insecure and put it out there on others. It makes them feel better.
Anyway does not look like you can reply to all the comments. I understand. No problem. I do pray for you melbel that you come to know Jesus so loves you. He wants you happy. I do pray you are happy and God Bless all of your comings and goings. When we know that I think it gives us hope. We are only in this life for a short time then we will go to where there are no tears if we know Jesus is Lord and believe in Him.
Love you girl. Keep going melbel. Phil 4:13 Skye
Levertis Steele from Southern Clime on April 13, 2014:
People get picked on for being fat, skinny, pretty, ugly, black, white, male, female, tall, short, blonde dark, disabled, smart, slow, and a million other things. We must hone our self-esteem in order to escape what we cannot change in others.
Adrienne Lawton from Deptford, NJ on March 17, 2014:
I enjoyed your post and can relate in a lot of ways. I have been naturally thin all of my life. Over the past few years, I have started gaining weight, but as a teenager and into my early twenties, I was always around 105 or 110 pounds ( I am 5'4"). It always bothered me when people came out and asked me if I was anorexic or if I eat. I always had a very high metabolism and was just thin. People treated me like I was a freak or that I should want to gain weight because I was thin. I always ate a lot and just burned all of the calories I consumed. It's nice being a little heavier now (I am 125 pounds) because people don't treat me like I am different. However, I feel like I have to watch what I eat now and make sure to exercise. If you are happy with who you are, you shouldn't be criticized for it.
Vel on February 11, 2014:
5'3 and 83 pounds and not because I want to be the thinnest person in the room. It's not funny when others play get the bone. It's not funny when fat women pick on the thin woman. It's not fun to go to the clothing store and find that the "Target" pants are sewn and sized two sizes to big and for hipsters. I have always been a thin person. I went for an evaluation and they wanted an outpatient commitment for six months 9-7pm.
emilybee on January 07, 2014:
Sorry you had to go thru all this! I am the same weight as you and have been thin by whole life. I had all the comments; what size are you, you're so small, but, always from large people. Back then I never said, "well, you are so big" but my mom always pointed it out, how can people comment on ones thinness but to mention ones obesity would be wrong? Perhaps large people should bite their tongue. Now that I'm an adult, when people go oh you are so thin, what a size 0? I say yes you bet!
stickman on September 10, 2013:
I'm having a hard time feeling sorry for the skinny girls, but a big thank you to Mithereal for summing up what it's like for skinny guys. Skinny girls are considered sexy by mostly everyone except other girls...just deal with their cattiness on move on for God's sake.
On the other hand, try being a skinny guy! No respect from other guys, and no girls are interested in you either. Average-size and bigger girls want big men to make them feel "protected". But skinny girls also want the big guys. There's no room for the skinny guy in this - it's a lonely place to be.
Michele Travis from U.S.A. Ohio on June 25, 2013:
Hi, I was skinny growing up, but gained a little weight in high school. After that I was diagnosed with epilepsy. One of the side effects is the loss of appetite. That was not too bad. I am 4'11" I went down to about 100 pounds. Then I had surgery in 2010. Went down to 85 pounds. Still have to take medication, because the doctors could not take all the lesions off my brain. No matter how hard I try, I cannot get about 95 pounds. I think 95 is fine for someone my size, but people think I have an eating disorder. I have even had people ask me if I am bulimic. Well, most of that was earlier, but you know what I mean. Basically, I am thin and small. Do you know how many times people have offered to give their weight to me?
momof2 on June 12, 2013:
I have been skinny my whole life and now have a boy who's skinny... and he's already getting crap from family and others. Sometimes people are just skinny and that's not a bad thing. He eats a ton and is very active... somehow it reflects on me that he's skinny, like I'm doing something wrong.
Sabine on May 06, 2013:
This is seriously how I feel and how my life has been. I´m 28 now and people still tell me I need to eat more. Sometimes at dinner people actually load up my plate with more food and sit there and make sure I eat everything. None of my other family members are skinny, most of them are overweight. Whenever I complain about not finding pants in my size they roll their eyes and tell me that I´m lying, that fat people have it hard, not skinny people.
mithereal from Tucson, AZ on April 16, 2013:
i totally understand and im a guy,
it is even more socially unacceptable to be a skinny guy.
im 5.4 and 103lbs and ya the rhetoric , stares, being called a boy, etc kinda makes you not really social. i eat normally and never have weighed over 110, since i cannot gain weight i have no muscle mass, the worst is being called a tweeker and drug addict as i have never used. i dont even try to date for 11 yrs, i got tired of being laughed at long ago, besides women that are size proportionate to me have their pick of men, most men want to date skinny girls, i just want one that's similar in bodysize!!!
vanessa on March 23, 2013:
As a small framed woman 5ft. I'm naturally thin. I'd never comment to a bigger woman on her size as I know how hurtful it is and I'm too wimpy to say a snide remark back when someone says something to me. Not only can people make you feel intimidated when your smaller but that you're inferior.
Ang on February 15, 2013:
This meant a lot to me. -Finally- someone understands. I get questioned almost daily if I have an eating disorder or about how much I ate that day. As well as the questioning are the insults. I never knew people could come up with so many ways to insult someone for being skinny. I have hyperthyroidism so, it isn't exactly easy for me to gain weight. I have been taking medication to treat my hyperthyroidism for almost four years and I am still underweight. In this day and age, (I'm a teenager in high school) girls show skin and are basically expected to look pretty and presentable and there are no other skinny people at my school so no one can relate. Every other girl is enviously perfect. I know I need to work on my self esteem and learn to get over this but, it's hard when people are constantly telling you that you're basically not good enough. Anyway, thank you so much for writing this article.It couldn't have been easy to share your story and it means alot to me that you would take the time to do this. It gives me hope. Thank you.
Ellie on January 27, 2013:
I am naturally thin and I loved this post so much. Thankyou!!
sfcowgirrl from San Francisco, Ca on January 24, 2013:
I actually am not SUPER skinny anymore, however, because I am smaller than most of my family, I get crap for it anyway. I model and therefore I try to watch what I eat and im just not that interested in eating garbage food...I dont feel good after I eat foods that are laden in fat, so I dont. I get crap for not eating enough or being such a princess about my food choices...NO I just dont want to eat nasty make you fat foods thats all!
jeannie123 on January 23, 2013:
I get so annoyed and frustrated at people when they call me skinny, I've gotten SO many comments like, "you need to eat a hamburger!" and "do you eat?" but i always keep it inside and just laugh it off. My family LOVES to make fun of my weight. I thought i was the only one who felt like this!
Anna on January 05, 2013:
I haven't had very much issue with teasing or bullying comments, primarily because I learned at a young age that if I didn't react, or if I just smiled at the commenter, they would stop. I was also home-schooled fifth grade, from fifth grade until the end of my first year of high school I was in a private correspondence school, and from then on I've been in a public online high school. I figured, however, that I should share my story regardless of my lack of trauma from people's comments.
I'm a 5'2", 86 lbs female, and have only once or twice managed to gain enough weight to get over the 90 lbs threshold. I eat like a horse, and have been the subject of, 'she must have a hollow leg' jokes. I'm particularly famous in my family for eating a Subway Meatball Marinara foot-long sandwich, a bag of chips, and drink in five minutes at a typical lunchtime, and still being hungry afterwards. My metabolism is so high I have to eat every two hours or so, or I start having blood sugar problems. When I exercise regularly, I usually double the amount I eat, and still have trouble gaining weight of any type. I hope to gain enough healthy muscle weight to get over the threshold of 90 lbs, soon, because there are some things I want to do this summer that have a minimum weight rule.
Chace from Charlotte, NC on December 18, 2012:
Ugh, definitely know how this feels. Thanks for writing this. I grew up really skinny (5'6'' at 90 lbs) even though I ate more than my 300 lb father and because of the complex I developed by people constantly telling me to "eat a sandwich", I ate so much just so I wouldn't be a twig. Bad habit to develop, lol. Voted up and more..
Tyler on December 17, 2012:
I know what you mean. I'm a 6'5'' guy, so with that height I get a lot of attention, but then I have always been underweight growing up too. People would call me a walking stick, a tree, a walking skeleton. My family would always pick and say I could stand sideways and disappear, or in the shower stand sideways and not get way, or if their was a crack I could fall in. It's not that I didn't eat, because I would eat constantly. They would always say I eat like a bird though, pecking at my food. I grew up with it, 21 now, so I never bothered trying to argue or complain. I kept it bottled up until I was alone. Now I have been exercising, working out with multiple protein supplements, drinking whole milk, anything I can fattening.
January I had a random collapsed lung they only told me was because I am tall, skinny, male 18-25 years old. I had to put on weight after that. Just do what you can. I am up to 170, put on 20, so far which is right there in my BMI.
Megan Dodd from Florida on December 17, 2012:
This is an amazing story and I'm so glad you finally shared. I can't even tell you how much I agree with everything you wrote. I have always had small friends for some reason and I see and have done exactly what you are talking about and for that I apologize to the world of tiny women. This inspires me to share the story of my struggles. Thank you so much for writing this!
Nathan Bernardo from California, United States of America on December 17, 2012:
I appreciate your very honest approach to this subject. I've always felt that it's wrong to judge according to whatever body shape or size someone is, and people seem to be obsessed with it. And unfortunately public school is the place to be abused for various manner of things, which leaves some heavy conditioning. One thing I've noticed is that some people are naturally thin, and I've heard people who really don't believe it; I don't know why it's unbelievable to them, it's obvious we all have different bodies with different tendencies and dispositions; and besides I've known plenty of naturally thin people and I know that they eat normally and just don't put on weight. Thanks for sharing this important testimony.
Cynthia Calhoun from Western NC on December 17, 2012:
Really thought-provoking hub! My hubby is naturally thin and he's always getting crushed at how people call him "skinny." We were talking about that as I read this. It can be really tough dealing with what people say. I see out of one eye and my other doesn't track well and PLENTY of people have let me know that I'm "not normal." *sigh* Wonderful hub and lots of Hugs your way!
Sheila Brown from Southern Oklahoma on December 17, 2012:
I can so relate to this! I was always skinny as a child. In elementary school, my mom had to make my pants. I couldn't wear a size "0" as the legs were always way too short. I was made to wear dresses to school, but was always embarassed because of my skinny legs. In high school I could wear size 0, apparenty they started making pants longer. I was in 8th grade when I got my first pair of blue jeans! I was SO happy! My nick name in high school, from the Spanish kids at least, was "pica dente". That means toothpick in English. I don't know how many times I went home and cried, just like you!
Anorexia was completely unknown in my day. Which I wasn't anorexic anyway. I was a very "nervous" child. I won't go into details. My senior year in high school, I weighed 95 pounds and still wore size "0". I was 5' 2". My self esteem was in the toilet! I would never be caught dead in a bathing suit! I was so happy when I reached 100 pounds, I was 21! At 29, when I married I weighed 103. At 56 years young, I weigh 120 pounds and the weight I gained is proportioned pretty well, except for my tummy. I still wear junior size 5 and am damn proud of it! I know what it means to be skinny. I know how you feel about all the comments about it too. No one thinks anything about calling you skinny. Yes, there are skinny jokes, just like there are fat jokes. I have heard them all.
Girl, just hold your head up high, because as you get a little older, these people will wish they were you! Voting this up and awesome! :)
Bee on October 28, 2012:
This moves me. I'm 5'3, 98-103 pounds, (age 20). I'm very petite, as I would like to call it. I wear size 00 to 0 pant size. It's very hard on me because I'm still trying to figure out who I am, while listening to everyone tell me what I am. I've never had an eating disorder; though, just like the author, I tend to eat way less under stress. I've looked up thousands of ways to gain weight, and nothing seems to work. Honestly, I'm not wanting to gain weight due to what others have said to me about it, but I want to be able to JUST ONCE IN MY LIFE donate blood. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to reach the 110lb mark that's required.
Being small is not a trait carried though out my family, on either side. So, in contrast to everyone else, I'm tiny. For me, being small wasn't normal, or a blessing. It was a huge concern to my family in the matter that people believe I am not eating enough, or that I'm not maintaining the food that I do eat. I have reassured them multiple times that I love food, and I eat plenty of it. The idea of making myself sick just doesn't sound appealing to me.
Hearing names has always been a part of my life. I've heard them all. Boob jokes are very popular, which is fine. I've embraced the fact that I'm permanently a member of the IBTC (itty bitty titty committee). Family members and friends alike make names or jokes directed towards me, though they don't mean it harshly. To me though, it's personal even when I joke along with them. I have stood up for myself multiple times, and things have begun to get better.
I don't know, guys. I'm happy that there are people who share the same difficulties as I do. However, I'm still at loss on how to be completely comfortable, and how to move on.
chellelouise on October 17, 2012:
I'm 5'4 and i also find it really hard to gain weight even though I eat loads! My mam said being skinny at a young age also runs in my family and they say to be 'thankful' about it. But I hate it! I hate being skinny especially as people think that they can be openly horrible to me. Its not fair, it shouldn't be seen as acceptable to tell someone they look ill or anorexic when they aren't. Another thing is that women tend to openly bully me saying I look 12 just because i'm skinny, and therefore 'not a real woman'. The real women campaign is also really unfair, it makes naturally skinny women feel like they aren't real women just because they haven't got curves. This is so unfair and makes me really angry.
Asha on October 15, 2012:
This is an awesome article! I weight 45kg and am 5'5. Unlike many slim girls, I have large boobs (D Cup). I was never teased at school. It's when I started in the workforce that I would get comments, ALWAYS from women who are "just concerned". It wasn't until I started standing up for myself (in a polite and humorous way) did people begin to understand. Never just accept comments about your weight. Put these people straight, politely and in good humour. I've taught many women this lesson (and they were mortified at their own behaviour when viewing it from my perspective).
Jessie on October 10, 2012:
this is fantastic!! i'm 5'2, 95lbs and NOT on any diet, etc. i stopped growing when i was about 13 - that was it. i keep healthy but not anorexic etc. it is annoying to hear all the rude comments...i would never say to a friend - "oh you look like you gained a lot of weight - maybe you should diet!" but people have no problem saying to me "you look so skinny - why don't you eat more."
Angelia on September 18, 2012:
Im from indonesia, and i really really am thankfull that u share ur story.. I feel so much better. People mock me and talk behind me about how small and skinny i am, it really stressed me out until now! Im still struggling gaining weights (eventough it didnt work). Now i feel that im not alone.. People around me keep saying that being too skinny is not as big deal with being obese.. No one understand about this issue. Sorry for my bad english :)
Evelyn2 on August 26, 2012:
Do you live in America? Move to Europe, like Romania. They seriously dislike overweight people here. You will just seem a normal size girl. I`ve never heard of women complaining about being skinny here. I am serious!
Sylvia K on August 15, 2012:
WOW! I've been waiting for someone to get the word out the way you just did-telling someone they're too skinny and making rude comments about their weight is JUST as bad as calling someone fat & talking to them about their weight. I get so damn annoyed at people who don't think about how much these comments hurt..I'm 5'1 at 98 pounds and I always get comments about how I'm too skinny & "don't look normal". In all honestly, I feel fine about myself and the way I look. But I get really down sometimes when people make such nasty comments like "You'd look sooooo much better if you gained some weight." Seriously world, these comments are hurtful & incredibly disrespectful and need to STOP. Thank you for posting this!!
Ellen Karman from medina, Ohio on August 14, 2012:
I too have been thin my whole life. Especially the first 40 years and I was extremely muscular. I was a size 0 I have proudly made it to a 2, I have a bad back and am on steroids which pack on the pounds and went up to a 4 last winter, but in high school where I was so active, on the track team, I showed horses, took Gymnastics so I ate like a ton of food at lunch and girls would accuse me of being bulimic and I would sit there until the food settled I would be so mad! I told them to get off their asses and do some physical activity and they wouldn't be dieting. The only diet I ever had, was making sure I took the time to eat as lately I just forget. I eat to live I do not LIVE to eat!! I feel your pain, Take it with a grain of salt and feel lucky. My plan has been to gain a half a pound a year after the age of thirty, thinking it would continually smooth out any wrinkles. I am now forty-five and I think the wrinkle plan has worked some what. Great article as not many of us have this problem! Ellen Karman
Inês on August 07, 2012:
Hi! i'm portuguese and first of all sorry for my bad english!
I'm also very thin, and I loved what you wrote because i have the same problem. I have 18 years. I hate being thin, makes me sad. I would like talk more about my life but my English does not allow! lol
Thank you for this text, it helped me a lot!
p.s: nice poll but i think most people who answer are thin people, i have the "impression" that everybody think that skinny girl= sick girl. i hope not otherwise i'll being single forever. x)
Missabees on August 02, 2012:
Because I'm skinny I'm
-never allowed to have a "fat day"
-never allowed to voice any insecurities about my body
-I obviously am purposefully trying really hard to be this way
-If I don't eat enough at a meal (maybe because I'm gluten-free vegetarian and there wasn't a lot of options) I get looked at suspiciously
-Everyone else has the right to talk about my weight whenever they want, even if it is in a negative context
-I'm not a "real woman" because I don't have "curves" (nevermind my hip to waist ratio is pretty nice)
-Any attempt to workout, eat healthy or generally be conscious of my health is obviously a sign I'm trying to lose weight
I could probably think of more but this is just off of the top of my head. I have some friends that are close to twice the size of me and yet I think they are drop dead gorgeous because beauty, to me, as an artist who loves the human figure in all it's shapes and sizes and uniqueness, knows no size. No one should ever be judged on their size. Ever.
samantha on August 01, 2012:
Im 27 5"8 and weigh 110lb i still get insults for being skinny...iv had 3 children and still ave the same body i had wen i was a teen peoplecsay i shouldn complain but wen uv lived with it all your life its hard not to...but the truth of the matter is knowone is ever happy wither their body and u will get peopke who are spiteful and thrive on puttin people down bt b grateful and feel beautiful no matter what all that matters is you are healthy xxx live long x
ActualName on July 29, 2012:
I got the same thing at university. I don't think I was ever THAT small... have put some of it back on now so it's hard to tell, but the new routine led to some weight loss and as a result friends would start going on about how ''skinny'' I was and whether it was ''deliberate''. I remember thinking how if that was turned on its head - ''How did you get so huge??'' it would come across as unbelievable rude. Sets a bad precedent.
C on July 27, 2012:
I know EXACTLY what you mean... I'm just about to start high school, there's only a month of summer vacation left... I've had so many problems in school...I've even tried to look up and see if there is a special school for genetically underweight children and teens, I swear they NEED to have one of those! I'm 5 ft 6 in and weigh 98 pounds, sometimes I think I'm just not genetically compatible to myself... The two specific things about me that don't seem genetically compatible being my weight and height.... I'm scared to step outside of my house while cars go by, or go into the store! I've actually developed a social anxiety disorder, because the way people react about me, and the things people say about me... When I read this article, I am just shocked that I didn't write it! I relate to absolutely everything you say! and it's not fair! There are points when the lunch ladies go to give my food, and one of the other lunch ladies will say "Why don't you give her a little extra" I'm tired of people discriminating against me, and using a type of segregation, or staring, or talking behind my back, or telling me I'm lucky, etc. People asking why I don't eat, people telling me to go to the doctor... Alot of people say they're jealous, or I have a gift! Its a curse! People don't understand how hard life is like this! ALL SKINNY PEOPLE SHOULD START A REVOLUTION! GO ON STRIKE! MARCH TO BE TREATED EQUAL EVERYONE ELSE!
z123 on July 19, 2012:
Nico on July 13, 2012:
Thank you for writing this, story of my life.
Ruth on July 13, 2012:
Like looking in a mirror!
Karen on July 05, 2012:
People will never no what we skiny people feel like inside & there's nothing we can do to gain whight & to have the never to to think we starve are selfs when we have lowselfasteem because we are all ways being looked at like we dont eat or we are sick in real life I hate being skiny I would do anything if could gain a few pounds people juge & dont even no what's going on mybe some are just made to be so skiny & cant change it being skiny has just lowered my self a steem
Karen on July 05, 2012:
I have 3 kids i have been skiny all my life like I cant get over 90 pounds & when iam pregnet iam like 106 at full term iam helthy docters dont help thay say you should be happy youre thing & helthy I been tesed all my life I thught when I would get older I would finley gain some pounds or after i had kids but iam 30 still cant get over 9th/pounds ive tryed every thing .
AJ on July 03, 2012:
Ive had the same problem with being naturally skinny. Im 15 years old and im 85 or 90 pounds at 5'2. Nice to know theres people like me and its hard some times in high school i get called ''bones'' or ''tooth pick'' an its hurts sometimes. But god made me a certain way so i learn to love myself giving everything ive been through being sick as a baby with lots of problems .I came out my moms stomach 2 ounces looking back im just glad to be on this earth
Sam on July 03, 2012:
I'm a teen, 5'7" and weight 105 pounds I've been skinny since i was little and it hasn't changed a bit! i totally agree with you! i eat actually more then a lot of my friends who are considered average and i have always been picked on. its hard because it really lowers your self image to the point were i wont even want to go swimming because of how i feel in a bathing suit. There's nothing i can do to gain weight and i just have to accept who i am. the truth is that i consider myself as beautiful but i'm criticized by so many people that i start to feel ugly. my parents love me and care about me so seeing that i've always been small makes them worry and they thought i had an eating disorder because maybe there was a day i wouldn't like what i was given on my plate but things have changed and ive accepted my genetics and so have they and i know that i am beautiful thank you for this article!
Leslie on June 27, 2012:
I needed this post! My mom has been nagging me to eat more and even if I know she's coming from a good place, it's just so annoying :/ It's not my fault I'm naturally skinny.
E on June 19, 2012:
Jeez I feel the same way!! In middle school, i was 5' 7'' and weighed 95 lbs.! I honestly COULDN'T gain weight! I ate, like, 2 entrees at lunch and gained no weight....... Also, being extremely tall didn't help.........:P
DimoniqueJ on June 19, 2012:
story of my life!!!!!!!!
Another random person on June 12, 2012:
This article has just made me feel 100 times better. Unlike you, I used to be a medium build, but after starting high school I got super into running and I naturally lost 20 pounds in about half a year. Some people say I look great and super muscley, but others think its gross that they can see my muscles and I get questioned because I never used to be this size. Truth is, just like Lobelia, I love my body and I've never felt better!
The Cat from Peru on June 10, 2012:
Hey there, I understand the pain of being too thin. I'm just slightly under my healthy weight-- I've gained and lost in a yoyo procession due to anxiety and things. People-- even some of my doctors-- think I'm anorexic. I don't think I am, though. I think it's because I have high-functioning autism, which makes me very regimented.
It feels so uncomfortable walking around in a crowd of heavier people! Like I'm some kind of alien! I'm trying to gain a bit of weight now. Wish me luck!
Sylvia on May 31, 2012:
I'm skinny and NOT aneroxic. i just cant eat much. i can eat a little and say i'm full. but i have a huge craving for junk food and sweets. something's wrong with me... ._.
Magenta on May 31, 2012:
I'm 4'11.5", and haven't grown since the fifth grade. I weigh 89 lbs, and am steadily losing weight, due to the food my parents are feeding me. I eat like a football player, yet I can't gain enough weight. I lose weight when I stress, too, because I can't swallow food, it just won't go down.
I've had so many people tell me how great it is to be tiny, but to me, it's nothing like they'd believe. I can't find anything in my size at stores, so I sew my own clothing, from the children-sized patterns.
Everyone thinks I'm anorexic, or bulimic, but I'm not. I was just built tiny, and the awful diet I'm being restricted to isn't helping me, either.
reagu from Los Angeles on May 29, 2012:
Being skinny has its own set of problems. But, IMO, there are less health concerns being naturally skinny and the maintenance might be a little more relax.
jo on May 29, 2012:
I've had the same problem over the years. Im 5'3 and weigh 109 pounds.
I used to get called "french fry", "toothpick" or "stick" things like that.
My teachers used to try and get me to bring more food with me in school because Im so thin they thought I didn't eat enough.
I still struggle with this and I want to feel better about myself.
Atleast I know Im not the only one out there with this problem.
meme on May 28, 2012:
I forgot to say she is now 15 bday yesterday and 85 pounds.
meme on May 28, 2012:
I just did a search and found this. It hurts my heart my 15 year old has the same experience. Her weight and size has not bothered her not until living here in NC and in high school. She is a beautiful tall young lady and naturally thin but healthy. I constantly tell her that I was the same at her age. People call me names. She wears longs sleeves and pants always. Does not like to wear skirts or shorts unless we are on vacation. She wears layers under her pants (which I told her not to do). We had an incident shopping yesterday while shopping I went into the fitting room with her. She had 8 layers under her pants including leggings/pj pants, sweats, and 2 pair jeans. I was so shocked and upset. It's good to see someone talk about it. I would like to return to NY where having a unique look is a blessing and it is a normal thing to express yourself and be different. People make themselves sickly trying to look like the both of you. Keep it up expressing yourself you are beautiful and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Jessika on May 26, 2012:
I'm natural skinny I don't really cared what peoples say like "(you to skinny you need to eat put some meat on your bones)" "(your head bigger than your body)" I try not let them get to me with them negative words i understand Im underweight for my average age but I don't believe i'm anorexia I eat alot I get full fast I'm 5'8 weight 120 my weight go up and down I gain and lose I believe because I worry to much when I'm stress out I lose weigh i don't really look at myself and a bad way i think my body is nice size inti somebody make it big deal say you too skinny make me want gain weight but I believe god bless me with the body that Right for me not what other people want for me #loving my body
camel76 on May 25, 2012:
I really love this article, I was looking for something on how to gain more weight, and thats how I came across this. I'm 34 years old I'm tall and skinny, I'm naturally thin too.its genetics my dad side there tall and skinny,I have a twin and older sis that are bigger than me, and my younger brother is tall and skinny, so we got the genetics from my dad side. There are days when i have insecure moments where i look at one of my fav celebs, and try to compare myself to them and be down because I'm skinny, and than i have confidents moments which I'm gaining and doing better at. because even though I'm skinny i look beautiful in the outfits i buy, I don't even look my age thats another genetic i have,people think i'm in my early or late 20's.only thing i hate is the job i have the uniforms we where is not the size i wear outside of work, so the cloths make me look skinny,and what annoys me is when some people make comments like she skinny or girl what size you wear even though they be joking, they don't realize if you are tall and skinny and wearing uniform that make your pants look baggy (in my head I let it go because i know outside of work i dont wear these ugly clothes LOL.
Growing up I really didn't get picked on about being skinny, I remember in middle school i had a huge crush on this boy and I remember him and his friend were talking asking each other will you go out with her they said yeah, she may be skinny but she have a cute baby face thats all it matter to me that they said i was cute, same in high school. even though I wore baggy clothes back than that was the style back than. so as I got older in my late 20's and early 30's my hate being skinny started.but now I'm loving myself more and more each day.some folks don't realize there are ladies that are naturally thin, like asians who are pretty and naturally thin. (SORRY IF THIS IS TO LONG, I JUST WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW THAT RATHER YOU FAT, SKINNY, TALL, SHORT, BLACK,WHITE ETC, YOU ARE STILL BEAUTIFUL IN GODS EYES.
Diane on May 23, 2012:
Hey, incredible, I am doing a radio blog about
Skinny People in a fat world. Most people can't imagine what a battle this is, not because we can't accept oursleves, but because others have trouble doing it. It's being small and strong inside, but everyone treats you as damaged or invisible: so you constantly have to boost yourself up. It's being what your baody feels is right in a super sized weight loss world.
My radio show will have a male co host with the same 'underweight' issue as me-- we need to get a forum for support so the others dont keep "eating us alive".
I was very glad to find your article! Keep chsaring!~
Good Health From Home
Healthy Home, Healthy Body
Dee on May 22, 2012:
Kudos! What a wonderful article given from the skinny perspective. Right there with everyone! A 28 year old female, 5'2", and 106.
jihan on May 21, 2012:
thank you for sharing your problem.It feels like am looking in a mirror just reading this.I ve been there for my whole life believe me and still struggling to be taken seriously.I think that beeing a medical student was even the hardest part of my problem and maybe my family too who was never supportive.I don't have much advice to tell you except being who you are all the time and keep smiling. god bless you!!
Amber on May 20, 2012:
Wow, you took the words out of my mouth. Here I am crying myself to sleep because my dads comment was the straw that broke the camels back, but reading this article every word related to me. I feel Much better, thank you :)
Olive on May 20, 2012:
You don't realise how many people go through the same thing as you do until you read an article like this. In addition to being thin, I'm tall. I live in a third world country where they don't even stock extra length jeans. The worst part is that even my friends and family laugh at me about my body. As if it's not bad enough that I have a low self esteem already. I think I would even be happier if people thought I had anorexia, in Africa the first question you're asked is if you have HIV/AIDS. Discrimination comes in many forms. It's nice to know that there are people out there who understand exactly what I'm going through.
HJ on May 18, 2012:
thanks for writing this, I feel your pain! and its even worse for skinny guys like me. I'm 5'5 and 110 lbs and always gets picked on by kids in school. Even girls that are skinnier than me pick on me because guys are not supposed to be skinny. And my sister is 5'10 and 110 lbs (I know its weird my sister is so much taller than me) and she has teachers that thought she was anorexic. But my sister probably doesn't get picked on like I do because she likes being skinny like she wears miniskirts and tank tops a lot even in cold weather. Both of us are not anorexic, we eat like normal ppl, just fast metabolism I'm guessing. And we're Korean so maybe we have a smaller frame as well.
older on May 16, 2012:
Hate to tell ya it never gets easier. Over 50 and people seem almost pissed off that I'm still small. They tell me to eat, I need to eat more, I need this and that and.....it never ends.
Hate it when they call me "skinny thang" I'm tempted to make a remark about their weight but don't.
dmop from Cambridge City, IN on May 07, 2012:
I feel your pain, I could be wrong, but it seems even worse for skinny guys. I'm 6' 1" and weigh 140 lbs, have since high school. I always heard you'll gain some weight when you get in your thirties, but I'm pushing forty and still nothing. Spent thousands on protein drinks and supplements over the years, hit the weights, considered steroids, but still the same weight as in high school. All the guys think they can beat you up and all the girls find you unattractive, or so it seems. It doesn’t bother me any more, but when I was younger it was all I ever thought about. Being smart didn’t seem to help much either. I just accept what I was given and make the most of it. Great article, I really admire your courage for writing it.
Charlotte on May 06, 2012:
I've always been naturally skinny too and I love my food, I often eat more than some people who are bigger than me! I've even been to the doctor and a dietician about it but they didn't really seem to think I have any health problems and it's just the way I am. What annoys me is that the media is always focussing on real beauty and "real women" which invariably means women on the larger side of average because they are the norm. I'm not saying this isn't a positive thing, and it is true that everyone should have confidence in who they are and not try to be stick thin if they aren't naturally stick thin. However, the media has created a hate campaign against size zero to such an extent that people now assume anyone who is slim must be starving themselves and can end up actually being quite nasty to people who are naturally slim. Surely "real beauty" is about making the best of your natural shape and your good points and being true to who you are inside and out, not just trying to make one section of society feel good about themselves by criticising another section of society!
Random Person on May 06, 2012:
Your article pretty much says all the things I've wanted to scream for years. Most of my friends are overweight, but I've never bothered them about it and never mentioned it to them. Yet they insist on poking fun at my size, or say I'm too skinny to be healthy (I'm about the same height as you, just a little lighter - with a very small frame) never mind that I can walk much further than them without getting tired and lack the joint and other health issues that they have or that I've eaten more steaks than a man twice my weight in one sitting. I've even gotten teased for helping someone move, though this was coming from someone who was doing very little actual labour themselves. So I'm glad I got to read this, just so that I know that I'm actually sane.
Lobelia on May 03, 2012:
This is great! I'm so glad I'm not the only one with this problem. I used to be at a "healthy weight" but after some troubles with anxiety lost around 20 pounds. I've tried gaining weight but can't seem to. I feel perfectly healthy and love my body but everywhere I look people are telling me to gain weight. It's not my fault that I was born with certain genes. People should learn that and stop with false accusations
Paulina on May 02, 2012:
if the guide c. thought you were not eating, why didn't you just go up to her while eating a huge pizza or ice cream? I imagine that would have changed her mind...
Or you could just have gone to the doctor stating your problem so he can write you a note stating that nothing is wrong with you. I know whats done is done but i'm just really curious.
Abigail on April 29, 2012:
I get the same thing they tell you your so skinny go eat, the first time it feels like a compliment but after a while it just doesn't sound right
I h on April 25, 2012:
Hi. 18 and 90 pounds. Since I was 12. Man I never thought about how hard it can be on people. Never really got picked on for it. Just some comments here and there n I reply about my fast metabolism.
Danielle P. on April 20, 2012:
Can I just say thank you for writing this? And for understanding? I'm currently 17 years old. I'm 5'10"-11" and weigh about 115... I have a very fast metabolism.
There is nothing unhealthy about me.
I have always gotten negative feedback from people for being so thin. And they constantly feel the need to point out, "Oh my God, you're so skinny!" And it sucks. I hear all kinds of great comments from my peers. It's never to my face. But it's always directed in my vicinity. And often as I'm walking by people, they whisper crap about me. Some people even believe I have an eating disorder. Which is hilarious because if they even put in any effort to know me, they'd realize that I eat ALL the time. I enjoy food thoroughly. And I have to eat every few hours or I end up starving.
And the things girls these days say to make them feel better about themselves. I can't tell you how often I've felt excluded from a group because I'm not "like them". They will call themselves "thick" when they're really just average sized and start talking about skinnier girls like they're scum. "Thick girls for the win!" UGH. And my favorite thing I've read from a girl who often posts this quote on her Facebook for everyone to see...
"Real men like curves, only dogs like bones." That statement kind of kills me everytime I see it. I'll admit it openly, I was not blessed with a chest. It's honestly pretty pathetic. But saying things like this really isn't necessary... It's hurtful. I'm not a judgemental person, I really don't understand why people are. Why can't we all just accept each other?
And my friends! I know they love me. And I love them. But let's face it. I'm tall, gangly, and a bit accident prone. I'm a walking advertisement for a giraffe. And they really don't let me forget it. I never feel like I can talk to anyone about being SO self concious because they don't understand where I'm coming from. They too, look at me and just say, 'You have nothing to complain about.' But oh! The list I could write you! They don't get it. They never will. And I feel like a burden if I even try. Clothes don't fit me. I can't ever find the right bra. I had major scoliosis because of rapid growth spurts when I was 13 and had surgeries to correct it. My left hip is now more prominent than anything. And it is a daily struggle for me to find something that even looks halfway decent on me. Another reason I can't wear bathing suits. And it's funny that they tell me I have nothing to complain about, when in reality, I have more problems! At least their bodies are symmetric! You can't exactly cut off hip bones to make yourself look more symmetrical... This is going into a different topic but really, I never get to vent. No one gets that part of my body issues. They can't know, they've never experienced it. It's a daily battle for me to get up and try to look confident and be cute when the only thing that goes through my mind is, "Do I look normal? And even on both sides?" Maybe that sounds silly, but it's the truth and it's a problem. I'm ridiculously self conscious and no one can completely understand. I'm awkward. I get it. I even embrace it when I can. But I'm human, I'm flawed. And I accept everyone. Why can't the same courtesy be extended to me?
I've been exercising lately to try to tone muscle and gain definition in my body. Nothing overboard. I'm really trying to accept my body. It's the one I have and it's all I have to work with. I should be thankful for even that. But it's hard. And a constant battle with myself.
Anyway, sorry for all that. I guess I needed a place to vent. Thank you for your article.
K on April 14, 2012:
I can totally understand where you are coming from with this and I really appreciate your writing. I was actually just looking up what a healthy weight is for my height and age b/c of self doubt due to comments people often make. I'm 5'8" and I think I weigh around 130 or 135 and I'm in my 30s. At work I have had several woman say things like I wish I could eat like you and be as skinny as you... even men have made comments about what I'm eating. Sometime I really want to just tell people to mind their own business. I just get annoyed with the comments... Not everyone is on a diet and I think people sometimes have problems understanding this. I notice it more now in my adult life, it never really was an issue when I was a child.
Maggie on April 13, 2012:
Hi I know how it feels im 16 and my hight is 5'2 I weight 81 I cry every night because my doctors say that I dont gain any weight they will put me in the hospital.
Wondercat on April 12, 2012:
Oh, and there's also a saying - 'Petite women are made for love, big ones - for work'. ;))
Wondercat on April 12, 2012:
I'm 5'4", 92 lbs, 21in waist. Recently, it was raining, I went past a group of boys, and one of them yelled - 'The girl is so slender, she won't get wet under the rain, as she can easily sneak between the raindrops!' Funny, and really, REALLY flattering to me. In the today's world where nearly everyone carries a huge load of fat on themselves, girls like us are real treasures - not a single drop of fat on fit, energetic, active bodies. And much younger looking, too. : )
Sarah Carlsley from Minnesota on April 11, 2012:
Kudos to you for writing this hub and putting this out there! I think people need to understand that what they say can hurt people.
However, you could take their comments as compliments, because there are millions of girls who would love to be naturally thin. But it's definitely not fair for anyone to assume anorexia.
Christine on April 09, 2012:
I am continually stunned at our society's focus on our looks: small, big, skinny, fat, and EVERYTHING in between! We consume what the media floods us with (best and worst dressed lists, celebrity's pictures posted EVERYWHERE with comments on their minute-to-minute changes in looks, clothes, makeup, weight, etc. It makes me want to scream!!! Our society is SICK! We ignore a person's character, talents and abilities, their contribution to community, and get stuck on what they freakin' look like! Mabel, I read what you've written and I see you are intelligent and sensitive. You ahve had to struggle in this sickoid society and you haven't let it make you bitter. The fact that you are more petite than most? SO WHAT! Why don't we see past a person's looks and see their character? We don't have to be such mindless sheep. You should feel sorry and just shake your head at the mindlessness of folks who have anything to say about your size-they are like, brain-damaged.
Kirara on April 08, 2012:
hi mel! :)
i know your feeling, and i know its hard when people think or say something that it isnt true.
but they dont have any evidence to judge you like that, they just judge you based on your appearance, but theres no nothing else.
so you can prove that you're not suffered anorexic or bulimic or combination of two of them. you can prove that you're not anorexic because you eat a lott and you still getting skinny (anorexic just ate a tiny amount of food, so they definitely wrong to judge you) and you also not frequently going to the toilet after eating (so it also prove that u're not bulimic). you have many evidence to convince them that you're healthy and syill skinny no matter what you eat.
it just genetic.
but i guess because you live in the country where most of them are curvy or obesed, so when they look skinny girl they think that theres something wrong with you. because theres no people in my country think that im anorexic.
i am naturally skinny just like you. my height 5'4" and my weight just around 80-85 pounds, never reach above that no matter how much i ate. i love food, i eat a lott, i also love snacks, ice cream, chocolate, and im also cheeselover. but no matter how much and how often i eat, its really hard to gaining weight.
but its really eazy to me to lose weight. if i think too much or worrying too much about something i can just easily lose my weight. its kinda of creepy actually. and the people around me know already about my eating habbit and my genetic, even they tell me if i dont have this genetic, i already grow become a gigantic monster.
but in my country(indonesia), i considered as a bit skinny because half of the girls weight just like me, and the other are a bit more curvy, but when i moved to china for study. i found out that the women in china are super skinny, they re like much more skinnier than me even they eat soooo much. because of that, in china in considered as average.
so i guess it really depend on the country.
and i believe that you can prove them that you're naturally skinny. ;)
Erika on March 25, 2012:
I am also naturally thin 5'3 97 pounds I have to daughters and when people look at me and say your so skinny I don't know what to say but now when my husband tells me that he likes me just the way I am and I go to buy clothes and they tell me "your so skinny" I look over and say thank you they look at me like I'm crazy I don't like being thin but there isn't anything I can do about it.
khushi saxena on March 18, 2012:
I am very hot and sexy but Iam very black and when I will become skinny i will be the most beautifull girl
Jade on March 17, 2012:
I have had them problems all my life. I was told i was to skinny to have a baby, then at age 19 and weighing 39kgs i fell pregnant, had a healthy pregnancy and weighing 48kgs had a natural birth, a tiny lil girl like me. In ur face haters !
Colleen on March 03, 2012:
Tonight I just happened to be looking up what my fat percentage should be for my weight. I came across your page and read yours and everyones stories. I feel so much better that I'm not alone. I have always been thin and was teased all through school. I too had to go to therapy in my 20s cuz it lowered my self-esteem so much. Now I am 37 and have gone on a gluten free diet due to some autoimmune diseases. I'm 5'4" and 100 lbs. Sometimes I feel too thin and feel like I better check fat percentage. I have very high metabolism. I eat alot sometimes and others not as much. I run an in home daycare and always on the move. I think I should work building my muscle. Thank you all for sharing your stories, it has definitely made me feel better about myself! :)
Jax on February 28, 2012:
It made me feel better to see all these people who have experienced the same as me. I was teased mercilessly at school, and you can't say anything as most people have no sympathy, we are lucky that we don't have to think about every calorie in food, but I have to eat a lot of unhealthy food to keep my weight up, I grew up with a mother who was the same and had a sister who was shaped like Marilyn Monroe and in the 1950's when she was young -being thin was not fashionable so she used to 'feel sorry for me' which didn't help my self esteem. My pet hates are that people assume you only eat lettuce leaves and don't believe you if you say that you eat well, if I want to eat healthy foods (which I prefer) the weight drops off me. (I am 5'9', 119lbs) My other pet hate is people (and they are usually woman!) saying thin women aren't REAL WOMEN, what the hell is a 'real' woman??? I have had three children, if that doesn't make me a real woman - what does? Woman are their own worst enemies, we should act like sisters to one another, I don't care what my fellow women look like, I just want us all to be healthy and happy in our owns skins. It takes all types and all shapes, and all are beautiful to someone. Lets be friends about this and not be unkind, whether we are underweight or overweight, it shouldn't matter. Luckily I am married to a man who has always had thin girlfriends and likes very slim ladies, but I know he is not the usual, and that's fine, like I said there is someone for everyone. :)
Erin on February 26, 2012:
Best article I have read in forever!! I felt like I wrote it myself!!! I am same height and weight. I get stomach ulcers to, and I don't eat when I'm stressed either. When I get sick I always get really sick because I have no weight on me. Anyway. Great article. So glad u wrote it :)
Alison on February 20, 2012:
I appreciated your article. I have been small my entire life also. I have always enjoyed being petite. I have been told that my legs were toothpicks or that a strong breeze would blow me away, but I took these things in stride. I have Never been ridiculed for my size as you have been, for which i am very grateful. My two daughters are very small also. I have always encouraged them to feel proud of their size. I tell them it's great to be petite! My 12 year old asked me recently if she was going to be a midget. I told her of course not, she was just going to be an adorable petite girl. She loved hearing that! I think that it is very important to instill confidence and a love of self in our children. We do this by our example. What we say and do in front our children can help them develop into amazing, stable, confident adults!
cazo on February 11, 2012:
Hi. I came across your post while I was searching for information to help my teenage daughter. I first want to say thank you for writing this.
My daughter is 15 and naturally very thin (no underlying health issues). I see a beautiful, smart, funny, caring young lady developing before my eyes and she sees an ugly, skinny girl with no breasts that guys will never like. Some of the experiences you talk about in your post are happening to her and I try to help her through them. She says I don't understand what it's like and she's right, I don't. I was a little heavier growing up so I went through different issues. Her self esteem is very low and she is seeing a therapist which is helping alot.
Your post helped me, as a mother to see into her world a little bit. Thank you so much for sharing with everyone.
Anonymous on February 08, 2012:
I'm naturally skinny and I can say say it sucks. I don't like being told you must be anorexic and being asked if I want a cheeseburger. Honestly the rudest thing and it hurts my confidence. I am probably the opposite of an anorexic I look in the mirror and wish I could gain weight. I eat a lot more than most girls to try to gain weight. I put on baggy clothing never skinny jeans or leggings, and amstarting to avoid shorts.so people don't notice as much. It sucks but God gave me this body for a reason and I'm just going to have to know that he thinks its perfect.
joe howe on January 30, 2012:
wow lizzy is mean!!!!
Jay on January 30, 2012:
Lizzy -- I don't think people were complaining, they were simply putting a different point of view across. Besides, even if people were complaining, why should they stop? Do you not ever complain about things? I bet you do.
Everyone has problems. Just because their problems are different to yours doesn't make them any less real. Are the problems you have with your weight suddenly invalid because there are starving children around the world? No of course not. Just like how a skinny person's problems aren't suddenly invalid because you have problems with your weight.
Again, just because their problems are opposite to yours doesn't make them any less real to them. I also think everyone has the right to complain every once in a while :)
Sarah on January 29, 2012:
Have to say I agree with lizzy. Stop complaining.