Sugaree

Hey, I'm Taz aka Sugaree.

I started writing earlier this year in April, when my PTSD stopped me working. I had been diagnosed over year before that but I had not been offerered any treatment, leading to severe depression and a strong wish to end my life. I worked on the good days and hid away on the bad days until the balance became unmanagable. At that point I went to stay with family where I was pushed to seek treatment before it was too late. It was then I noticed just how stunted my vocabularly was when required to speak about how I felt, it was almost impossilbe. The words seem to crowd and fight with each other behind my teeth and it got worse the worse my mood and anxiety was.

I began with poetry, the first was a simple conversation I wished I could have with my mum, the second was the same but to the psychiatric team who visited daily. Even I couldn't believe just how honest I was able to be, the words and rhymes haven't really stopped since then. I now have five collections of poetry regarding my experiences of mental health and recovery.

Unfortunately despite effort, I was admitted to a psychiatric hospital in April. My writing really took off in there due to limited activity and feeling so unwell and still not being able to say the words I needed to in order to feel better. The poetry flew out alongside a diary from admission to discharge and few blogs about mental health and admission.

I was discharged at the very end of July and have been playing with bits and pieces to improve my writing, reading more, writing more, reading about writing, writing more poetry and have just started another diary. It was then that I thought I might be better to share my diary, my story as I go along this time in the form of a blog.

I've recorded some of my early poetry and set it to music as I had plenty of time on my hands in hospital and also like the idea of making hard-hitting poetry musical. Hence the name BeatPoet and my middle name is Sugaree.

I am..... SugareeBeatPoet.